So after much deliberation, I finally got my lazy arse to an osteopath near my house, who prodded, pushed, massaged, and popped my back until my hip felt hot and inflammed which I was assured was how it was supposed to be. After the 1 1/2 hour session, my osteo taught me the following things:
- One of my legs is longer than the other one. Not so much so that I have to use crazy sized shoes, but enough to mention.
- One of the many multitude of reasons why my back has been hurting for the past, oh I don't know, forever, is because I'm hyperflexible, so my ligaments are too stretchy, and my muscles aren't doing enough work... I've already been asked and in case you're wondering, no, this does not mean I can put my legs behind my ears like my friend had seen on tv. The sort of tv program that was being watched was not specified but I'm certain it wouldn't be the type of show that could be shown before the 11pm watershed.
- My cheque writing leaves allot to be desired. As I was standing there at the end of the session, my hip throbbing and my head spinning from the pain, I got a 5 minute lecture about how I'd be a classic victim of cheque fraud because I forget to put the word ONLY after the amounts, and draw a line on the empty bits of the cheque. To be honest, I so rarely write cheques to anyone I actually have on the cover of my book the words: "TO goes on top line, AMOUNT goes on bottom", because I've managed to fuck up more cheques than not.